Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for December, 2005

Among my Christmas haul this year were many gift cards to such places as Old Navy and Target, which normally I shun but now I have requested in order to help me rebuild my wardrobe (currently: 2 pr shoes that I wear to work, both have holes in them; 4 pr pants that I wear to work, one pair is verging on too casual and one pair has holes). As you can see, I need an urgent clothing infusion or I may end up at work barefoot and naked. And that’s not the way one wants to present oneself in a public library.

A little backstory.

I’m not good with clothes shopping for myself (yarn shopping is, of course, never a problem. It all fits). I look, I see too much trendy crap, I stop looking and go home. I’m not a trendy girl, so most of what’s on the racks make me feel confused (I thought that bedazzling one’s jeans was so over. Why has it come back? How do I make it go away again?) or angry (This is why American women have body image issues, you bastards, because these stupid jeans called “hip huggers” only look good on women with no hips!) and then I don’t want to spend my money on anything and I return home to the same sad clothes and think, “Well, these aren’t so bad… I can get along with just these.” (It took me six months of shopping to find a wedding dress that wasn’t too beady, too poofy, to frilly, too expensive, too awkward, too binding, or too freakish. I ended up with the most stripped-down dress it is possible to have and still look like a bride.)

So, it was time to expand the wardrobe to include items that (a) were new and (b) fit me. I went out on Wednesday night after work to run my gift cards into the ground. I went to Old Navy first and –hells yes!– they were having a sale. I grabbed 12 (twelve!) pairs of women’s pants in two different sizes and headed to the dressing room. Of the eight pairs of jeans I tried on, a whopping NONE fit me, and of the four pairs of dress/casual pants ONE pair fit me. Yes, I went into the fitting room with TWELVE pairs of pants and came out with ONE. I almost cried. Why didn’t these women’s pants fit me? What makes it impossible for PANTS DESIGNED FOR WOMEN to fit me?

Answer: my womanly figure. Yes, I am an average(?)-sized woman (complete with the hips for the child-bearing) and I cannot wear most jeans that are supposedly created so that they will do nothing else other than fit and possibly enhance the female form. Even if they are in my size. The problem is, once the pants are ample enough to fit over the hips for the child-bearing, they are freaking enormous in the waist and there is no belt on the face of the earth that can make that gap go away. (You know what I’m talking about, right? The gap between your jeans and the small of your back that–no matter what you do to thwart it–always shows off your undies when you bend over or sit up straight.)

At this point I’m thinking screw it. I got one pair of pants, and Oooh, here’s a pretty top (that I don’t need, but am buying to mitigate the sense of failure)… when I wander over to the men’s department and see they’re selling extra-loose jeans (appealing! why don’t they have these in the women’s section??!). I grab two sizes and head to the dressing room, where I learned an interesting (though “bizarre” is not inappropriate here) lesson:

Men’s jeans fit my womanly curves better than the women’s jeans.

I give up.

(but I don’t have to go pants shopping for another year at least!)

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

A Little Change of Scene

Things are a bit different around here, as you may already have noticed. I’ve been out of things today and whee! my blog suddenly (not to say impulsively) has a new look. I’m not sure if I completely dig the new banner, but I like the look of the main page more than the old one.

I had a pretty alright Christmas. I’ll go into more detail later, but: Nick’s cousin had a baby on December 1st, so I got to hold a 3-week old baby girl on Saturday.

Bliss!

(I hope everyone else had a rockin’ good time and got their stockings filled with goodness and cheer.)

Read Full Post »

Merry Christmas!

Read Full Post »

And why am I sitting here typing?

I’m really not. I’m just saying hello. And that I’ve decided to add two kitchen sets (potholders, dishcloths) to the list. Why? I think it’s best we don’t ask too many questions of the crazy lady with the needles, hmm?

Here is another wintery-wonderlandy picture, as I am not posting pictures of my projects for another, oh, three days.

(This was taken in the Reference Room of the Library.)

Merry Stitching!

Read Full Post »

And they mostly said, “Okay, that was your one freebie. Mock us again and you’ll get the exploding wires inside your house. Now go make stuff.”

I started the Lloyd Scarf on Wednesday night, just like a good little knitter (I’m going with knit instead of crochet because Lloyd likes the look […snerk, I’m sorry, that started to get a little silly with the alliteration] of a knitted rib pattern, although Pica is right–crochet is by far the fastest). Of course, I have no pictures because I’m busy knitting the dern thing (maybe tomorrow. or not.). It’s going well, and it will be done on time. I know it will, because it has to be.

In the spirit of getting my shit together (because there are 4 days left, people. Four freaking days!), I started making a list last night of the Christmas gifts we’re giving to our family this year:

  • My Mom — Clapotis in Malabrigo 100% Merino (still a soft and loving but totally impractical triangle of doom. No hope of being done for Christmas. I’m buying her something else. I think this shows remarkable maturity on my part. Or a total lack of discipline in not being able to get it done. Either way, I don’t have to think about it for 3 weeks.)
  • My Libraryschool-student Sister — chenille scarf (done!)
  • My Nursingschool-student Sister — Whatever it is, it will also include her Seven Brides for Seven Brothers DVD, and (and this is where my heart just burst with happiness and left pieces of happy bits all over my insides) I get to teach her how to knit!!! She asked me to teach her on Christmas Day, and I’m just freaking out with joy. I thought about buying her fabulous beginner yarn and fabulous needles, but she’s not sure she’s going to like it (I think she will!) so she didn’t want me to buy her the stuff. But maybe I will later. Like, after she totally falls in love with it. Mmm, yes.
  • Lloyd (nursingschool-student sister’s boyfriend) — the Lloyd Scarf (which, fortunately, I can keep knitting until Christmas Day afternoon! Woohoo!)
  • My Dad — possibly a Brian Wilson CD. Possibly something else altogether. Nothing yarny.
  • Other member of my “family” who reads this blog — I’m totally not telling. But it’s not all the way finished (85% so far).
  • My friend who took me to the ballet — the scarf from last post, which I showed to her with the explanation that no, it won’t be done for Christmas, but thank you for taking me to the ballet. She likes it.

And then I started thinking about the Beloved’s family. And that’s when I wondered if the Yarn Gods were just joking when they said I got a freebie.

  • His Mom — ??!!!
  • His Brother — ??!!!
  • His Sister-in-law — ??!!!
  • His Dad — ??!!!
  • His Stepmother — ??!!!

But then I thought of my workbasket (okay, one of my workbaskets. I have four. Don’t even ask how many workbags I have.), and how I made a bunch of scarves that I was going to sell (never got around to that) and that I kept them! They are still in my house! Now I have some options! Fortunately, he was thinking about gifts too, and we have everyone taken care of now. I can’t go into further detail because my soon-to-be SIL reads the blog (Hi Wanda!) and it would be lame to kill the surprise.

Now that I’m all organized I have to go make stuff, as bidden by the Yarn Gods. (only one more day of work–today–and then I have 6 days off! I have time to knit and crochet, and I don’t have to worry about getting caught at my desk!)

And here is another wintery picture full of cheer. (I’m very into trees, these days)

Read Full Post »

I’m throwing caution to the wind.

I started another scarf last night. (Yes, last night–when I should have been working on the Lloyd Scarf. What? Like you’ve never done procrastination knitting. Don’t judge.) I justify this bout of start-itis by reminding myself that I have finished the scarf for Laura (chenille, I need futz with you no longer!! Huzzah!), and that I have all this time left. So much time! And I’ve been meaning to make something for this friend for a year and have failed thus far. This friend has invited me to see the Joffrey Ballet do The Nutcracker on Saturday. I have deluded myself into thinking hope that the scarf will be done on Saturday. If not, it will be lovely train knitting.


(as you can see, I have mastered the heck out of seed stitch)

Funny thing about this scarf… I went home today on my lunch hour to knit (eating was an afterthought) and while I was taking up my needles I heard a huge explosion outside my building. Knocked out the power, mostly (I didn’t know that one could get only one-third of one’s normal electricity supply–I thought it was all or nothing), and freaked me out. After a bit the girl down the hall pointed out a flaming bit of electrical wire. Yes, the cable leading to our building (that connects to the corner of the building that holds my bedroom) was on fire (but the bit on fire was at least 25 yards from my building. At least.).

The explosion was the transformer freaking out. Nothing at all supernatural about that. Nope, everything nice and scientifically explained here. Absolutely no connection between my desire to knit and the big ol’ electrical kerfuffle. None at all.

I’m starting the Lloyd Scarf as soon as I get home from work.

“Let’s just say that if complete and utter chaos was lightning, [she’d] be the sort to stand on a hilltop in a thunderstorm wearing wet copper armour and shouting ‘All gods are bastards’.” –Terrry Pratchett

Read Full Post »

Oh, I Love My Sister

Everything was going so well on Thursday.

I had the day off, I slept in till 10:30 (no kids! no pets!), I knit like a crazy woman on the scarf for Libraryschool-Student sister (I discovered that when knit on size 13 needles, chenille cooperates rather nicely). I noticed the snow (lots!) and rejoiced in my enforced stay-homeyness. I shoveled (twice), and I made tasty dinner for the Beloved and myself. Huzzah, Thursday was a success.

Then came Friday.

After work I came home and picked things up (we had friends coming over), then sat down to knit on the chenille scarf for Libraryschool-Student sister. Then I get a call from Nursing-Student sister. Chit-chat, blah blah, do you have my Seven Brides for Seven Brothers DVD? (don’t laugh… every group of siblings has its own quirk) What do you want for Christmas? Do you want me to make something for you (please say no, or at least say “Oh yes, a hat!” or “One mitten would be lovely!”)? Then she says, “Did you find yarn for the scarf for Lloyd?” (her boyfriend, a lovely and charming guy, for whom apparently I was supposed to be making a scarf). Um, what?

Turns out he had admired a scarf I was knitting (the 4×4 rib scarf) (I remember him admiring it. Like I’m going to forget that) and said he wanted one in camoflage colors. I THOUGHT HE WAS JOKING. Lloyd is a jokey kind of guy. I didn’t think he was serious. Now I’m supposed to find yarn, find a pattern, and whip up a scarf for him in two weeks?! TWO WEEKS!

All this is running through my head while I’m trying to get the whole story from Nursing-Student sister (maybe he didn’t really want one, maybe he was just joking, maybe she made the whole thing up) and running to my stash to find yarn for the scarf (because I know I have some bulky-weight Wool-Ease in manly colors somewhere). I got her off the phone, cursed my stupidity for not starting an “extra” scarf for those “just in case” giftings, and rummaged through the bag of Wool-Ease. Huzzah! I have found 2 balls of “Walnut” and 1 of “Bay Harbor” — the scarf is possible!

I spent a good part of friends-over-for-drinks time last night trying to suss out a pattern that would look decent on the bulky-weight yarn (much harder than I thought, possibly due to the “drinks” part of the night), finally abandoning it after the 2nd beer thinking that there are more important things in life. Like friends. And Mad-Libs. And Jameson whiskey. And we all know where that thinking gets us… not very freakin’ far on the Christmas knitting! (I’m good at self-guilt).

I was going to sort the situation out tonight, but the snow is falling like bra straps after a senior prom and I’m not sure we’re going to make it up to my hometown. Ah well. More knitting time!

Your gratuitous Christmassy picture of the day:


(it’s Humpty Dumpty as Old Man Winter, outside the Library)

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »